Straight from the pen: Debbie

29 March 2020 / Topical / Blog Debbie

Even though we are still in the middle of it, there is a time before and after corona. I notice it in everything. When I watch television and see a group of people, when I go shopping and have to walk around people, when I think about future vacations and outings with my family. How special is it then that I am one of the bloggers in this IkPas period during the Great Change?

It is a question that can be explained in two ways. On the one hand, something is happening in this IkPas period that has never happened before. Something that of course also has an impact on the goal of this campaign. So this started as a personal challenge for me, combined with gaining writing experience, while I'm also writing a book. But along the way I ended up in 'crisis mode' in many areas, just like many with me. And that makes describing my experiences very different from what I expected. Experiences – and that's the other explanation of the question – that seem small and irrelevant now that the world is fighting so massively against corona. For example, I saw the broadcast of 'De stand van Nederland' on Thursday about the consequences of this crisis for entrepreneurs and my heart broke for these colleagues. Trying to make the most of it. Into the action. Carry on, carry on, carry on. I recognize myself in this drive and realize that I am now doing the same. I was already an entrepreneur who wanted to get things done yesterday, now I feel that urgency even more. Fortunately, we can make adjustments by accelerating plans that were already there. We'll have to wait and see how those turn out to fit in the future.

These are uncertain times that demand a lot from us. The experiences of myself and of fellow entrepreneurs, in turn, seem small when it comes to having to fight for the lives of corona patients, to limit the future consequences nationally and missing loved ones.

This week was definitely a lot tougher for me than last week. It seemed as if reality dawned on me more. Wednesday was by far the best day of all, with my very first online event for job seekers: Walk&Talk Online. Far out of my comfort zone, presenting in front of the webcam – and yet it all turned out not to be too bad. It was especially wonderful to be able to do something and to notice that, no matter how small, I could bring a little positivity in these weird times.

Unfortunately, I couldn't hold onto that positive energy for myself – over the course of Friday I was absolutely crisis-tired, I-Pass-tired and perhaps most tired of all the balls I had to keep in the air for myself . When I went shopping for our dinner, I gave in to it: 2 bottles of Leffe Blond disappeared in my bag. And later that afternoon they also found their way into my taste buds. They were happy with it, even though I had imagined my next beer later and in a more positive atmosphere.

Fortunately, I still have a small paragraph left to end my contribution of this week on a positive note. As I write this, Saturday morning 11 o'clock, the sun is shining in the garden of our new hideaway. For the first time this week I found the peace this morning to 'just' enjoy it, with the sunglasses on my face that I recently bought in 'our' new village. What a wonderful place this is and how important it remains to enjoy the here and now. To keep making the damn best of it. From this crisis and from my alcohol use. Because it wasn't all or nothing, right? It was about awareness, and we absolutely succeeded. I have become aware that a period like this, 30 days without a drop, helps me a lot to keep taking the step of conscious alcohol use. That lesson is already in my backpack for the coming time.

Just a little while and this unique IkPas period will be over. In the last few days I pass all the alcohol and look back with satisfaction. Perhaps for you, brave fellow IkPasser, it is also a nice gift for yourself to spend the next few days reflecting on what you have learned from this experience.

I wish you a lot of health, positivity and cool sunglasses.

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